Many of us lead busy lives – it’s an often heard lament – “ I don’t know where the time goes – I’m so busy!.”  And yet if we are so preoccupied with the doing side of ourselves, we may miss the beauty of the present moment.  Having worked with many persons who are facing a terminal diagnosis, I’ve learned from them the importance of slowing down and finding meaning in the everyday simple things that may be missed when we are rushing around.  Facing our mortality can be a gift if we take the time to prioritize the important things in life.  Often, this involves those persons in our lives that mean the most.  One of my clients who was nearing end of life told me, “It’s all about relationship.”  We may fall into the trap of thinking that our happiness comes from purchasing a new car, buying a bigger home or getting that promotion at work.  While these things may bring a sense of satisfaction and feeling of success, they don’t necessarily give us a lasting sense of peace or even fulfillment.  When we look back on a life well lived most of us will remember the ones that we loved, learned from and grew with.  It may not be about our possessions, but the memories that we make along the way with those that we love and cherish.  We don’t have to wait to slow down and get in touch with our being side – after all, we are human beings, not human doings.

Take time to think about what your priorities are and where you are putting your energy.  Find out what is truly important to you and what gives your life meaning and purpose and then focus on that.

Michael Singer writes:

“Don’t be afraid of death. Let it free you. Let it encourage you to experience life
fully. But remember, it’s not your life. You should be experiencing the life that’s
happening to you, not the one you wish was happening. Don’t waste a moment
of life trying to make other things happen, appreciate the moments you are
given.”

(The Untethered Soul)

Originally posted 2025-09-27 16:59:01.

The post Prioritize the Important Things in Life first appeared on Geoff Straw - Counselling.

Resilience can be defined as the ability to recover quickly from an illness or set back, recover strength  or the ability to remain centered and able to cope with change and uncertainty

The great mystic Rumi, who lived in the thirteenth century left us with an essential key in the quest for a peaceful mind: “The moment you accept the troubles you’ve been given, the door opens.”

You may be wondering how acceptance of the challenges in your life could possibly lead you to a positive outcome.  But acceptance is the beginning or first step on the path to well-being.  Once we become more aware of our habitual and negative, limiting belief patterns, we can then begin the work of understanding and eventually transforming them. Thich Nhat Hanh, the Vietnamese monk and peace activist who wrote and lectured extensively on finding peace and balance, taught the practice of mindfulness as a way of awareness.  By practicing mindful awareness we turn our focus inward, perhaps by becoming aware of our breath in each moment.  In this moment, we are no longer running away from our emotions and the stress in our lives.  We are compassionately facing our fears and our struggles, the tension in our body and our addictive patterns of escape from our own selves.

Through the process of mindful observation, we begin to see how we might be blocking our well-being unintentionally.  Becoming more resilient, we begin to make choices that better support health and happiness.  Some roadblocks to resilience include negative thoughts and beliefs about ourselves and the future, which can lead to depression.  Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) is a type of intervention that can help us to transform our beliefs into positive and realistic expectations for health and success.   Irrational thoughts, also known as cognitive distortions, are patterns of thinking that are not based in reality and can lead to negative emotions and behaviors. Common categories include all-or-nothing thinking, overgeneralization, jumping to conclusions, emotional reasoning, and personalization. These distortions can contribute to anxiety, depression, and other mental health conditions. We can learn to adopt a more resilient mindset by practicing positive, realistic thoughts and beliefs that will promote our happiness and contribute to a life that is meaningful and has purpose. 

 If you would like to learn more about resilience, or how to change your thinking to a growth mindset it may be helpful to contact a mental health therapist who can assist you in reaching your goals.

Originally posted 2025-09-13 17:16:26.

The post Becoming Resilient first appeared on Geoff Straw - Counselling.

“To be present is to know what you need to know in the moment.  To be present to something is to allow the moment, the person, the idea, or the situation to change you.” (Breathing Underwater, 2011)

We become receptive and willing to let go of rigid programs, thoughts, beliefs and behaviours that may be holding us back from self awareness.

To practice being present, bring your focus to your breathing, even for just a few minutes and notice what it feels like.

Originally posted 2023-05-24 12:21:40.

The post What does it mean to be present? first appeared on Geoff Straw - Counselling.

The authors write, “…practicing gratitude on top of receiving psychological counselling carries greater benefits than counselling alone, even when that gratitude practice is brief.”  The researchers also studied the brains of the students and found that this brief practice of gratitude positively influenced brain functioning.

So what are the implications of this study, and many others like it?  Finding a way to be grateful may be a powerful way to shift your mood and overall health.  Incorporating a gratitude practice into your daily life does not need to take a lot of time or effort and the payoff may be astounding.

Some ideas:

• Write letters to friends , family or even people you haven’t met expressing something about them that you are grateful for
• Make a list of things in your life that you are thankful for – these can be big things or small things
• Visualize the positive aspects or experiences in your day that make you feel good
• Express verbally your gratitude to others, or to yourself even
• And then…. observe what begins to change in your life 🙂

Originally posted 2023-02-19 12:20:10.

The post Being grateful promotes health and well-being first appeared on Geoff Straw - Counselling.

This approach emphasizes making room for quiet in our daily life – something that most of us find difficult to do.  How can we truly “listen” enough to ourselves, our feelings, our passions, our disappointments and our joys?  There can be much wisdom and insight to be realized if we can nurture this part of ourselves.  We are used to looking for answers outside of ourselves.  Some ideas are as follows:

Find a time during your day when you won’t be disturbed and can sit comfortably on your own

Turn off all phones, screens, media

Gently bring your awareness to your breathing, simply following the rise and fall of each breath

When a distracting thought comes, simply return your focus to the breath

Sit quietly, without an agenda and notice what you feel in your body

Even five minutes a day is a good start, then return your focus to the room and carry on with your day

If you feel drawn to writing, you can record your experience – whatever it may be

Originally posted 2023-02-05 12:20:57.

The post Listening to the inner silence first appeared on Geoff Straw - Counselling.

“Acknowledge the feeling, give it your full, compassionate, even welcoming attention, and even if it’s only for a few seconds, drop the story line about the feeling.  This allows you to have a direct experience of it, free of interpretation.  Don’t fuel it with concepts or opinions about whether it’s good or bad.  Just be present with the sensation.  Where is it located in your body? Does it remain the same for very long?  Does it shift and change?”
-P. Chodron, “Living Beautifully with Uncertainty and Change.”

Originally posted 2022-05-16 12:13:38.

The post Living is a form of not being sure first appeared on Geoff Straw - Counselling.